


You're not broken ;

by TheGirlInThisWorld



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV), Thirteen Reasons Why - Jay Asher
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Healing, M/M, Multi, Other, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Self-Harm, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24795433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlInThisWorld/pseuds/TheGirlInThisWorld
Summary: Tyler Down had just graduated Liberty High School, along side all of his friends. He had survived high school. A survivor. A whole new world was waiting for him, however, there were still demons roaming underneath the surface. Now, it is time to take on a new challenge; College. A new place, where he does not know a single soul. The thought of going there is haunting him, but it is the college of his dreams. A college, where the focus is on the arts and crafts; photography, painting, drawing, writing, acting, filming etc.Anastasia Washington (New character) had also just graduated Liberty High School, attending the same college as Tyler Down. Anastasia is a natural talent when it comes to drawing and painting, and generally has a very creative soul. It's no secret, that many of the kids at Liberty High had a rough high school experience, and Anastasia is no different.Despite going to the same High School, had the two quiet kids never met each other. Anastasia had quietly been following along what had been happening in Liberty High, but never known everyone involved. What leads to the two's first meeting happening on a bridge, far far away from the college?
Relationships: Charlie St. George/Alex Standall, Jessica Davis/Justin Foley, Tyler Down/ new character
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	You're not broken ;

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!  
> I have created a new character called Anastasia Washington, whom you will slowly get to know over time. The POV will change between Tyler and Anastasia at times, to give some insight in both of their minds. 
> 
> TW  
> There will be mentions and flashbacks to Tylers assault, self-harm, talk about suicide and drug addiction, as well as portrayal of panic attacks and anxiety. 
> 
> There is always hope, and I hope to show this in this little story.

Tyler Down's POV

So, this is it. Tyler looked around the room that had been his bedroom the last 18 years. This was his last night sleeping here, before heading to a Liberal Arts college tomorrow, based in New York City. It was a bittersweet goodbye. On one hand, his bedroom had been his safe-space for many years, a place where he could be himself, without the fear of being bullied or judged for who he was. However, the last couple of years had also made him associate his bedroom with negative feelings and bad memories. From the time where he had been photographed naked through his bedroom window when he was 16, or the time he recorded a video, that would have been his suicide "letter". At times, it could feel as if he wasn't alone in his bedroom. It felt as if there was a monster, creeping in the shadows. Sometimes the monster was very hidden, hard to spot. Those were the good days, where everything seemed to be getting better. Other times, Tyler felt as if the monster filled his entire room. The creatures that left him with this cold and scared feeling, sending shivers down his spine. Since Tylers assault, had Jessica been one of the people he talked most to. She understood his pain, and he understood hers. She had been a big part of Tylers healing process, helping him realize that it will get better one day. As Tyler was sat there on his bed, he could hear his mothers footsteps approach his bedroom door. He felt slighty off, anxiety was creeping right around the corner. He tried to keep his cool.  
"Hey honey" Tylers mother said, as she opened the door. She leaned up against one of the archways, with a cup of tea in her left hand. His mom and dad still did not know about his sexual assault, and everything that had happened to their son, and he did not plan on telling them anytime soon. It would be too painful to go through everything that had happened, so he would rather leave his house knowing that his parents thought their son had had an alright High School experience.  
"Tony and Jessica are outside, they are here to say goodbye." His mom then added, and smiled at Tyler. She then took a sip of her tea, and proceeded to walk away, leaving the bedroom door open. Tony and Jessica were the last two left, who still had a bit of time before they were going to leave for college. The last couple of days had been emotional, saying goodbye to everyone one by one. Clays departure was the hardest, as there was the grief of knowing that Justin should have been there to say goodbye to his brother. Tyler took a deep breathe, and then stood up from his bed. He was still wearing his everyday clothes, so there was no need to change to go say goodbye to his last two remaining friends in town. He made his way to the frontdoor, and outside stood Tony and Jessica. Both smiling, Jessica with a wrapped gift in her hand. Tyler smiled, and walked swiftly towards them.  
"Hey there, buddy." Tony said in his calming voice, and proceeded to meet Tyler with a warm hug, making the anxiety that had been creeping up on Tyler, go away. Tyler then hugged Jessica afterwards, and then the three friends looked at each other.  
"We brought you this, as a little 'goodbye for now' gift" Jessica said, and handed Tyler the wrapped gift he had spotted earlier. Tyler couldn't help but smile, it didn't matter what the actual gift was - it could be a pair of socks for all he cared, it was the fact that they had thought about giving him something. Tyler hugged both Tony and Jessica once more, as a 'thank you' for the gift. He kept looking at it, then looking back at his friends. He could see their excitement in their eyes.  
"Open it, silly!" Jessica then said, miming the act of opening a present with her hands. Tyler then started to tear up the gift, and inside of it, there was a photoalbum. From the outside, it didn't look like anything special. Just a brown, boring album. However, when he opened it, it was something magical. It was photos of all of them throughout the last year, however, none of them were taken by Tyler himself. These were pictures, where Tyler also was in them. The photographer had been photographed. Tyler was usually never in any pictures. Turns out, Tony and Jessica had been secretly taking pictures. Tyler started to tear up, and cluthed the album to his chest.  
"Thank you guys, this is... thank you." Tyler was smiling, this felt unreal. He didn't want to leave this behind. A sudden sadness washed over him like a wave, making him lose the smile on his face.  
"What's wrong?" Tony then asked, looking over at Jessica, who's facial expression also had a confused look to it. Tyler just looked at the album, and then over at the two friends again.  
"I am scared." Tyler said, with a uncertainty in his tone of voice. Jessica put her hand on Tylers right arm, and looked at him.  
"Scared of what, Tyler?" Jessica then said, moving her hand away from his arm again. Tyler felt stupid. He knew, that everyone else were going to find new friends at college. Move on with their lives. They were all good at being social, even Clay, despite his ,at times, social awkwardness. It was something else when it came to Tyler, he wasn't good at it. The bullying over the years had completely ruined his confidence when it came to making new friends. Now, he was going to lose it.  
"I don't want to leave you guys. I am not-" Tylers voice started to break, he could feel the tears making their way to his eyes. "- I am not going to make any friends when I move to New York." He couldn't keep them back. The tears. He could feel a few running down his cheeks, and he looked down into the floor. He felt embarrassed, whenever he started to cry. Ever since Monty did that to him, he would start to cry more often.  
"That is not true, Tyler. You are a great guy, and you will find friends. Trust me, Liberal Arts are full of people who will find you interesting." He could feel Tony pull him in again for a hug, as he was talking to Tyler. He could then feel Jessicas hand on his back, as a way to tell Tyler that she was here for him. Tyler stopped crying, and the three friends sat down on Tylers porch. They talked for about an hour about everything that had happened at Liberty High. It was past midtnight, when the two friends left in Tonys mustang. Tyler was left alone on the porch, hugging the photoalbum tightly. He stood up, and walked over to open the frontdoor. As he walked in, all the lights had been turned off. His mom and dad had gone to bed. He didn't like the darkness. It felt cold, almost empty. He made his way to his bedroom, and closed the door. He then wandered over to closet, and changed into some sweatpants and a t-shirt. He felt weird, when he changed in his bedroom. It never felt the same, ever since someone took that picture of him that night. He walked over to his bed, placing his phone on his bedside table. Tyler looked over at the suicases by his closet, filled with most of his clothes and important belongings. It felt weird, all of it. He crawled under the duvet, trying to shake off the feeling. That icky, anxious feeling that had been stuck with him all day. 

As he was laying in bed, he randomly thought about Estella. He was reminiscing about prom and the good times at Liberty High, and then remembered that the two went to prom together. The two dated for a short time, before Estella decided to call it off. She didn't like the thought of long distance when he was heading to college, and Tyler respected her choice about ending the relationship. Despite it making him sad, he was glad it ended when it did. It would most likely have hurt a lot more, if they had continued down that path. Tonight, Tyler was able to fall asleep, without too much trouble. Some night, the panic and anxiety was too much. However, tonight he was able to think positive thoughts before falling asleep. Hopefully, it could continue this way tomorrow when he would depart to New York and his new future.


End file.
